Dear Neil: Valentine’s Day just passed by. I didn’t think it would bother me that I’m not in a relationship, but it did. I spent the day with one of my grandchildren, but it did not erase my sadness. Last summer I went to a college reunion, and had many men flirting with me, but […]
Dear Neil: Several weeks ago, you wrote about a husband in New Zealand who has been unfaithful to his wife for decades. He said he couldn’t help himself from straying, seeing prostitutes and watching porn. You advised him to look at why he feels so empty, offer his wife a truthful description of his behavior […]
Why does it hurt that the Broncos were humiliated and embarrassed in the Super Bowl? I shut the TV off in the third quarter, when the score was 30-something to 0. I felt completely deflated—like a balloon that had lost all of its air. But I didn’t lose the Super Bowl, the Broncos did. So […]
In honor of Valentine’s week, here is a continuation of some of the basic intimacy skills a healthy relationship requires of us: Make your relationship a top priority. Don’t spend your “prime time” consistently preoccupied with other things, and don’t permit yourself to be too tired when you’re around your partner. Consistently show up both […]
Here are the basic intimacy skills a healthy intimate relationship requires of us: That I communicate with you the very best I can. Good communication takes place when I put aside my own thoughts, feelings and needs for a while to concentrate my attention on you while you are speaking. When I listen, I give […]
Dear Neil: Could you write an article about dealing with loneliness after the death of a spouse? I found myself missing male companionship—not romance necessarily—just conversation and activity. I have friends experiencing this same issue. Can you offer any advice? Alone in Vail, Colorado Dear Alone: There are four main tasks for you to do […]
Dear Neil: I have been married to my second wife for almost 15 years. We have two boys, ages 10 and 8. I am 58 and my wife is 45. I was married to my first wife for 22 years, and have three children with her. I have been unfaithful to both my first and […]
Dear Neil: I’ve been involved with a man for the past several months who seems to have trouble sustaining erotic arousal with me. I’m 25 and still a virgin. He’s 31 and experienced. We have an amazingly intense emotional connection. I know he finds me physically attractive and thinks very highly of me, and yet […]
Dear Neil: My husband left me 4 weeks ago. We have been married for 2 years, together for 4, and have 2 children, ages 4 and 2. I was pregnant when we met, and am now 27 (he is 24). We have been fighting a lot, and he is often angry at me. Frequently he […]
Everyone knows that it feels more intimate to be connected to the people we care about and love. But what does that mean, and how do you do it? How do you stay connected with your spouse or intimate partner—or for that matter with your children, family and friends? What do you do? How do […]