What Happy Couples Do That The Rest of Us Don’t What is the difference between happy and unhappy couples? What do happy couples do to make their love last longer? What secrets do happily married people know that the rest of us haven’t figured out yet? “There are couples who remain deeply in love for […]
Forgiveness Permits Us To Release The Past
When was the last time you forgave someone who hurt you? Forgiveness means to grant pardon without resentment. It is experienced intellectually, emotionally and spiritually. Forgiveness is a key to happiness and well-being, because it releases the anger, hurt, bitterness, pain, fear and even sometimes the illnesses that we carry around. One of the reasons […]
Lust
Ask people the importance of chemistry and lust to the health and well being of their intimate relationship, and they definitely have strongly held attitudes and opinions about the subject. Several thousand readers from around the world responded to the question posed in this column, “How important is lust, chemistry and sexual attraction to a […]
Quiz: Talking to Each Other
Couples Communication These are more couple communication exercises taken from Bonnie Sose’s book Talk to Me. To get the most out this exercise, allow each person to answer the same question before you go on to the next question. How is your mate unique? What needs of yours does your mate fulfill? Can you remember a […]
Quiz: Communicating
Talking to Each Other So frequently do marriage therapists—including myself—hear couples complain that they don’t communicate well, that I thought I would offer an exercise for those couples who would like to improve the quality of communication in their relationship. These questions are taken from Bonnie Sose’s book “Talk to Me“. Name seven specific things […]
Loving Unconditionally
Loving someone unconditionally is what most of us want to feel, what we hope to feel and what we do feel at times. But most of us also have desires, feelings, wishes and dreams, and if our wishes are ignored, violated or dishonored, we will—knowingly or not—fall out of love with our intimate partners. Thus, […]
Unconditional Love
What is unconditional love? Do you receive it from someone, and do you give it to other people? For that matter, do you feel unconditional love towards yourself? What is unconditional love? “Loving the person even if you don’t like their behavior,” says Amy T. from Triangle, Virginia. “Accepting the person for what they are, […]
The Art of Forgiveness
Forgiving someone means to pardon them while giving up your resentment, and letting go of your urge to punish. The decision to forgive someone arises out of the desire to be at peace with yourself and others. The person who forgives usually gains more from the experience than the person being forgiven. It is an […]
Learning to Forgive
“We have been married 38 years, have four children and five grandchildren,” writes a woman from Milwaukee. “Last December, I confirmed my suspicion (that my husband) had been seeing someone else. She’d just turned 40, which is three years older than our oldest daughter.” “The other woman sent me copies of photos, notes and cards […]
Solving Conflict
There is Another Way Terry Dodson tells a story of learning about handling and resolving conflict. Because of space limitations, I’ve had to edit his tale to its essence. “The train clanked and rattled through the suburbs of Tokyo on a drowsy spring afternoon. At one station, the doors opened and suddenly the afternoon quiet […]