Adding Romance to Your Relationship

Want to put some spice, zing, spark and pizazz back into your relationship? Try being more romantic.

Romance is not about elaborate gifts or surprises, although elaborate gifts can be romantic. Romance is about doing the little sweet things for someone else, which can include unasked for and surprise gifts. Surprise gifts are cherished.

The following are a compilation of ideas gleaned from the book 1001 Ways to Be Romantic by Gregory J.P. Godek.

  • Say “I love you” at least three times today. Repeat dosage every day for the rest of your life.
  • Compliment her. Repeat every four to six hours.
  • Run your hands under hot water before going to bed.
  • Call her from work for no other reason than to tell her “I love you”. Make it a habit.
  • Cuddle up in front of a roaring fireplace. No TV. No kids. No phone.
  • Look—no, gaze—into her eyes more often.
  • Spontaneous celebrations. Occasions: It’s Tuesday! It’s a sunny day! Girlfriend/Wife Appreciation Day; Hug Day; A Great Accomplishment At Work; The First Snowfall; The First Day of Spring; Full Moon Day; Spring and Autumn Equinox; Winter and Summer Solstice; Payday. Props: Confetti, champagne, balloons, candles, chocolate.
  • Change one bad habit. Preferably the one that he/she’s been nagging you about. Stop smoking. Drop ten pounds, etc.
  • Hug. Cuddle. Snuggle. Touch. Stroke.
  • Brush her hair for her. Be gentle.
  • Create an “at home date”, and include dinner, dancing and formal attire.
  • Don’t just walk into the house like you always do. Pause on the porch…ring the doorbell…and greet her with a rose and a bottle of champagne.
  • For a gift, get extra-nice wrapping paper and fancy bows. Never give a gift without wrapping it.
  • What’s her all-time favorite meal? Learn to make it..
  • Embark on a series of “restaurant discoveries”. Each week go to a different restaurant. Choose a “theme” that appeals to both of you. For instance, find the best
  • French restaurant in town; find the best diner in the state; mix and match all the ethic restaurants; Chinese, Mexican, Greek, Thai, Italian, Indian, Japanese, etc.
  • Do you know what your partner considers erotic, or do you assume you know? Do you figure she likes what your last girlfriend enjoyed? Do you think he’s just like the guy described in last month’s women’s magazines? Talk about what each of you considers erotic, and set your inhibitions and judgments aside.
  • Go lingerie shopping together.
  • Fulfill a fantasy. Greet him at the door wearing only high heels, garter belt and stockings.
  • Fulfill a fantasy of her’s: Become her vision of Prince Charming…whether it involves dressing in a tuxedo, or in a sexy tank top T-shirt and hardhat. Indulge her.

Don’t use lame excuses to avoid being romantic, such as “I don’t have time.” If he/she doesn’t rank up there with your work, your ball games and your favorite T.V. show, why don’t you simply get a dog for companionship and save yourself the trouble of dealing with another human being?

Two other lame excuses: “I forgot.” (you’re allowed to forget occasionally, but not consistently. If forgetting is a habit, you’re sending a clear signal that he/she is just not that important to you.), and “Real men aren’t romantic.” (if Real Men aren’t romantic, then Real Men are lonely)

You sometimes work overtime at work. Why not occasionally work “overtime” on your relationship?

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