Tips for Finding That Special Someone

When You Don’t Have a Valentine

It’s Valentine’s week, and you don’t have anyone special to call your own.  Sound familiar?

Here are the best ways of finding that special someone if you’re looking for a Valentine:

  1. Go where people have the opportunity of talking or interacting with each other, such as an adult-education class, a tennis clinic, a professional seminar or workshop, a travel show or a photography class, to name a few.  Decide what you are interested in doing, experimenting with or trying, and then find groups, organizations, classes, workshops, committees or clubs that offer the activities you’re interested in.
    • Be willing to try new things and expand your ideas about what’s fun.  If you find classes, organizations or clubs that sponsor activities you’ve never tried, you’ll discover whole new groups of people.
  2. Join a professional or work-related association and actively participate in it.  Volunteer to help out, head a committee or other wise take on a leadership position.  The visibility will help you get to know others—and will also help them get to know you.
  3. Find one thing that you really do well and teach an adult education class or workshop on the subject.
  4. Volunteer for a high-profile position in an organization or club where you will come in contact with a lot of different people.  You could also make a presentation, lead a group, chair a committee or organize an event.
  5. Try Internet dating—or the personals.  Internet sites such as or E-Harmony have a combined total of millions of single subscribers looking for an intimate partner.  Put a profile of yourself on there, accurately describing yourself (age, height, weight, etc.), include some good photos of yourself, and then do a search about who’s available.  It may not sound romantic, but it works very well.
  6. Other options on where to go to meet new people include dating services, dance classes, church/synagogue single’s groups, Parents Without Partners socials—and be sure you go to all  parties you are invited to.
  7. Tell all of your friends, family, colleagues and co-workers that you are looking for a mate, and ask them if they know of anyone they can introduce you to. Even your hairdresser may be able to be of assistance to you.
  8. Try “speed dating” events where you get seven minutes or so to meet a variety of new people.  In Denver, call Date-A-Thon (303) 691-1726, or try Colorado Free University’s Speed Dating class at (303) 399-0093.

Romantically connecting with someone new requires risk and courage.  It demands that you be willing to tolerate nervousness, awkwardness and rejection in order to give yourself an opportunity of finding the relationship you want.  You may have to screen a large number of applicants for the position of being your mate, because you won’t connect with or be attracted to everyone, and not everyone will be attracted to you.

Take advantage of opportunities when fate throws you together with someone who interests you.  Seize the moment.  Seize every opportunity that arises.  Fortune favors the bold.  How do you seize opportunities?  Introduce yourself to someone who attracts you.  Smile and initiate a conversation.

And refuse to give up, staying focused on your goal of finding someone to call your own.  The only thing that can stop you is allowing rejections and disappointments to sour your spirit.

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