Measuring Your Love Life

What is your sex life like?  How do you feel about sex and your own sexual health and well-being?

Some surprising, interesting and revealing findings have recently come out about people’s sexual attitudes, values and practices.  According to the recently published Janis Report on Sexual Behavior, did you know that:

  • Men 65 and older are having as much sex as men ages 18-26.
  • 31% of adults who describe themselves as “very religious” have had extramarital relations at least once, and 71% had premarital sex.
  • 22% of men and 17% of women reported having had at least one homosexual experience.
  • 64% of Catholics, 62% of Protestants and 68% of Jews report using contraceptives.
  • 26% of women who consider themselves politically ultra-conservative reported having had an abortion.
  • Women with the highest education reported having had twice as many sex partners as any other group of women, and the most sexual experiences before marriage.
  • 11% of men and 23% of women reported having been sexually molested as children.
  • 10% of American men and 4% of American women have had more than 100 sexual partners.

The following questions, adapted in part from Joseph LoPiccolo’s “Sex History Form” may help you clarify what it is you feel about the quality of your sex life:

  • For men, when did you get your first erection, and how did you feel about it?
  • For women, how did you feel about your first menstrual cycle?  Who did you tell and what was their reaction?
  • When did you start to masturbate?  How often do you masturbate?  Do you bring yourself to orgasm by masturbating?
  • In a sustained relationship you’ve been in, how has the sex been between the two of you?
  • When you look at your genitals and your naked body in the mirror, how do you feel about it?
  • How frequently do you and your mate have sexual intercourse or sexual activity?  How frequently would you like to have sex?
  • Who usually initiates sex?  Who would you like to initiate sex?
  • How frequently do you feel sexual desire?  This may include wanting to have sex, planning to have sex, feeling frustrated due to the lack of sex, and so on.
  • For how long do you and your mate usually engage in sexual foreplay (kissing, cuddling, etc.) before having intercourse?
  • How long does intercourse usually last?
  • Overall, how satisfactory to you is your sexual relationship with your mate?  How satisfactory do you think your sexual relationship is to your mate?
  • When your mate makes sexual advances, how do you usually respond?
  • When you have sex with your mate, what percentage of the time do you feel sexually aroused, turned on or excited?
  • When you have sex with your mate, do you have negative emotional reactions, such as fear, disgust, shame or guilt?
  • If you try, can you reach orgasm through sexual intercourse?
  • Do erotic or pornographic pictures, movies, or books usually arouse you?
  • What percentage of the time does the male have trouble in getting or keeping an erection before or during intercourse?
  • Do you feel pain in your genitals during intercourse?  What percentage of the time?

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